For the longest time, you thought being in love was wonderful. But the truth has been a rather bitter surprise, hasn’t it?
It’s a fucking cliche but it’s true. The only way to know if it’s true love is if it hurts. Because if it doesn’t hurt, then it’s not love. The more it hurt, the deeper was your love!
Most of us learn this the hard way.
They say that it’s better to have loved and lost than not have loved at all. Well I’ve got news for you. “They” are a bunch of sadist masochists. I am well aware that it’s an oxymoron. Here’s why… Masochists because they like to dwell in this pain and sadists because despite having been through that terrible ordeal, they make up quotes like the one above and love to watch naive little hearts be broken into a million different pieces… I guess it’s true what they say, “misery loves company”.
So yeah, I’m disagreeing with this age old saying. Don’t choose love. Choose money, choose career, choose your passion. Heck choose to watch paint dry on a fricking wall. Basically choose anything as long as you can avoid this trap. It beckons you with its tempting tendrils and before you know you’re stuck so deep in the web and the only way out is heartache and more heartache.
It’s ironic how there are some things we never develop tolerance to.
They say that once you’ve been in love you see rainbows in everything. But what they don’t tell you is that, once you’ve had your heart broken the technicolour becomes a black and white silent movie, pretty damn fast. And not the funny kind.
It’s almost as if you were doing fine (not a 100% great, but you were managing to get by), and you’re walking along the road of life just minding your business when all of sudden you’re hit by this draft of happiness, warmth and something else you can’t really explain but you can feel it. It makes you feel whole and adds a spring to your step and you can’t stop smiling. And before you know it, the smile has become forced and turned into grimace before settling into a fully blown scowl. You didn’t even realise that you’d been dragging your feet for the last mile or so.
When this supposed feeling of “love” began it was so sudden and it had literally swept you off your feet. However, when IT leaves you, it for sure makes its presence known. You can feel it being wrenched out from your self bit by bit and you wonder if the agony ever gets any better. Falling in love may be the “best” feeling in the world, but falling out of love or having your heart broken will drain every single ounce of happiness from your life. Otherwise, how else do you explain the feeling of trying to breathe underwater. It’s as if your lungs are crying for some air, but every damn breath is so painful and you can feel your chest getting heavier. And finally when it’s almost out of your system you’re left weak like a malnourished person waking up from a coma, wondering if you’ll ever feel whole again.
And as you join the ranks with your fellow Sadist-machochists you realise, that every one is broken; some are just really good at hiding their cracks.